If you’re aiming to achieve better work life balance, and satisfaction in your life, sadly, wishing upon a star may not provide all the answers – being practical in your approach will. Life coach Meredith Haberfeld has some suggestions to get away from “fantasy thinking.”
Fantasy thinking is basing your vision for the balance in your life on pie in the sky thinking, like saying to yourself, “With a full time job and two young kids at home I want 3 hours at yoga every day, to go out with friends three times during the week, and have dinner with my family every night” says the life coach. Instead, she recommends these tips to get out of that mindset and into something productive, rather than complaining about or tolerating what you currently have going on that may not work for you, and dreaming about a pie in the sky fantasy:
* Get out your calendar: Sit with your calendar in front of you, Haberfeld says, “play with a sample week, and fill in all the different elements” of your life that would be “sufficient to make you happy.” This will help you see what is really possible.
* Think it through: The life coach says it’s important to “do the detailed thinking of all the components of your life, and how they fit into your calendar in a way that is absolutely sufficient for your happiness.”
* Don’t look at things as all-or-nothing: Instead, do the actual mapping in your calendar to find a balanced solution that makes you happy. “For example, I might love to go to yoga every day,” the life coach notes, “but I could absolutely be content with two times in the week and one time on the weekend.” And instead of bemoaning not having enough time with your kids, determine for yourself how much you need to feel happy, plan that in conjunction with your other commitments, and don’t mess with it. There is “an equation” that is a beautiful fit for each person if they do the detailed thinking to get there. And then you can put an end to the wistful thinking and have a balance that feels good and makes you happy.